Standing Still

Just finished reading my latest post for the 10th time. And yes I am still frustrated in my current place and situation. I can also still honestly say that I have not given back an inch of ground that God reminded me of on Sunday. I still wage war daily over my thoughts, deeds and actions to the point that I have begun to feel numb in the fight. Just a Warrior swinging his sword hoping to strike something, anything that will turn the tide. It is here that Jesus simply says Stand still. Lost for what else to do this seems like a simple request from my Lord. It becomes clear to me that by standing still, even though I am not advancing, I am not retreating either. Standing still and holding my ground, pausing for rest, recovery and when necessary a change in marching orders. What has me standing still and thus frustrated??? In no particular order.... My marriage, my ministry(God's call on my life), my children, my finances and my health. In other words am I doing enough to excel in any one of those areas. I can say that in times past when any one of those areas were out of sorts, it would serve as an immediate excuse for me to retreat into the safety of sin. The logic being if things weren't going right for me then this leap from grace won't make it any worse. All it accomplished was the addition of another hardened place in my heart that God would have to fix.

I am done with that mind set but the fight still remains because as we all know, the flesh does not give up that easily.

So I am standing still, armor on and sword at the ready. I am looking for my next set of orders from my Lord and waiting to hear the call to advance. This fight is not pretty or poetic. It is dirty and harsh. But I am still here and sometimes especially in times like these that is enough. I am fighting to win at any cost and my enemy will not win the day. Jesus has already proclaimed me victorious, I just need to raise my hands and remind myself.

H & C-- thanks for the encouraging words.